Three Ways to Fill Your Heart and Soul this Season
by Diane Berenbaum
and David Morgan
The fall season is coming to a close and winter is on its way. It's a season that gives us the opportunity to stay inside and look inside. As days grow shorter and skies turn darker, it's an opportune time to turn inward and reflect, “What can we do now to better ourselves, or for that matter, better our world?”
I was pondering this very question when I happened to connect with pianist, singer, songwriter David Morgan of Redding, CT. His music, which ranges from jazz to pop, can rejuvenate me with its smooth tones and soulful lyrics.
We agreed that the world would be a better place if each one of us did three things: Give, Listen and Make Peace.
- Give. Just Give. Ask yourself—is your focus in life on taking or giving? Giving is only true giving when it is on the receiver's terms, not your own.
Be someone who gives a compliment, a kind word. Give your time and energy to help others or a worthy cause. Give from your heart and help a child feel worthwhile. Give up your stand to really hear another's point of view. Give a helping hand when you see someone in need. Give more of yourself to your family, your community. Give when others least expect it.
If you focus on giving, then everyone “gets.”
- Listen. Really Listen. When a cup is full, it cannot hold any more. We must empty our cups to hear others. But, too often, our egos get in the way.
When we truly listen to someone, and hear not only their words, but their thoughts and feelings behind those words, we make a real connection. When we reflect on others' words, withholding judgment and assumptions, it is we who change. We come face-to-face with who we are and are able to change our perspective and our behavior. And when we do, our relationships will grow stronger, healthier and more meaningful.
- Make Peace. Be someone who understands, respects, cares, and acts in loving ways. If we don't act in a peaceful way at home, at work or with friends, how can we expect world peace?
You have the power, right here, right now, to make peace in your home, your community, at the grocery store, at the doctor's office…with your loved ones, with those you dislike, with mere acquaintances, with those who have hurt you…with yourself. Be peace.
It's All about Others
So why are there so few real “givers” out there; people who transcend themselves and go beyond their needs in the interest of others?
Clearly, our society is consistently sending messages that reinforce the, “it's all about me” mindset so prevalent today. It is when we turn that around and make it all about others, that we make a difference.
As another famous songwriter once said,
- To everything - turn, turn, turn
- There is a season - turn, turn, turn
- And a time for every purpose under heaven.
- A time to gain, a time to lose
- A time to rend, a time to sew
- A time to love, a time to hate
- A time of peace, I swear it's not too late!
It's not too late. But it takes more than declarations at dinner parties and bumper stickers on cars expressing our point of view.
Instead—Just Give, Listen and Make Peace. You'll be a lot better and so will the world.
P.S. You can listen to David Morgan's album, Ordinary Glory, at http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/dmorgan or www.itunes.com. My favorites are It's Love and Let the Dance Go On.
Diane Berenbaum is a long-time contributor and former editor of the MAGIC Service Newsletter. She has more than twenty-five years of experience as a consultant, coach, and facilitator. Diane is the co-author of How to Talk to Customers: Create a Great Impression Every Time with MAGIC® .